Monday, December 1, 2008

A Fish and His Water

I hate to sound like a broken record but last night I woke up in the middle of the night and found I could not get back to sleep, so I did what I usually do in those cases which is chant mantras and in doing so I found out that chanting mantras is not a very good way to go back to sleep. Why ?

Because I now felt energy, lots of energy flowing through my body (and soul). I briefly considered getting up and having a turkey sandwich because turkey is supposed to contain 'L-Tripofane' or some such chemical that naturally induces sleep but since I was not hungry, I abandoned that plan.
So, I decided that I would explore the energy I was feeling. To do so was easy, just let the feelings come to me. A thought came to me - Do you truly wish to become a guru ? Are you willing to risk all you have now for the pursuit of spiritual progress ?

Granted it waa about 3 am and granted one does not think too much about 'all I have now' at three am. 'Spiritual progress' sounded much more exciting and appealing to me. A Christmas analogy might be something like this: your rich uncle Bob brings in a gift for you. It is in a huge gift wrapped box. He tells you that once you see this gift all the rest of your toys will seem dull. What do you do ? Do you look at your Wetsy Betsy doll, your Transformer action figure action set, and your Chicagopoly game and say no way am I giving these things up. I just got them. Or do you open the big box ?

Surprisingly, some kids might be afraid to open the big box and a few years ago I would have been one of them. But last night, when the big box of spiritual progress was offered to me - I opened it.

What I found inside cannot be described. But I can describe my interpretation of it. Or better yet I can describe what it meant to me. Everything I have ever dreamed about ( in the good dreams) was there and there were instructions on how to get them. Beyond that, a bunch of people stood waiting for me and one in particular showed me the form of the universe, how it works, and beyond that this person showed me an even bigger gift wrapped box. He said that there many more boxes waiting to be opened, each box containing bigger and better toys than the one before. That is the nature of spiritual progress.

I realized that learning manifestation was a cool gift but I really wanted to open the next bigger box. I also realized that like a fish who flies out of water, I had to go back to my native environment before I could move on. I had to practice my out of water breathing, I had to grow some lungs. I did not want to because like a kid I wanted to look inside the next big box but also like a kid, I realized that this toy is pretty cool too. I want to ride this bike for a while.

So I kept saying my mantras which were for growing lungs, I mean becoming a guru.

Happy Monday to you,

1 comment:

Soulsearcher said...

Sounds like you're going through the same thing as people on that game show--Do you want to keep what you have or take door #1?? What to do, what to do? Spirituality is a journey and you are on it. Just like your writing--keep going!