A Little Lotta Reiki

This is a representation of the 7 major chakras of the human body

Last night, I went to a reiki gathering at the Center. I had to go because I was one of the dudes that was doing the Reiki on the others. We have been doing this for four months now on the last Sunday of each month. I have to admit my enthusiasm was waning. Originally, I thought this would be a way for me to get back into the practice of giving Reiki but petty squabbles as to how to run the show (of which I was part of) were taking its toll on me. I was not having fun which is something I have to have in order to do Reiki. For me, Reiki is the giving of Divine Energy to people through me ( I am the conduit not the Source). As such, it affects me when I give Reiki to others. (It changes me). If I am not in a light mood, I open myself up to all kinds of crap (which is attracted by my crap). Last night, I was in a good mood, so it was easy for me to do this two and a half hours non-stop. I felt wonderful throughout. But the battleground remains for control and I am contemplating ceasing my involvement in it. I still want to do it so I am ambivalent about the whole thing.
The second issue that comes up for me is what the energy does to (for) me. I feel that doing Reiki is a positive thing that alters my own energy in a positive way. But it can make a lot of crazy things happen in one's life. Crazy dreams and stuff. Sometimes I wonder if I have enough whatever to handle the situations that jump in front of me. I have to remind myself that I am never given something I can't handle.
The third point I am going to make is this - Even with reiki energy being sent to them, the Bears still managed to lose. (Sometimes I wonder what good is Reiki.)
Oh well, I am still a bit spacey from yesterday (mostly because sleeping after giving Reiki is a task - I have too much energy flowing through me to sleep so I stay awake most of the night).
Hope tomorrow is better,
Frank