Saturday, December 13, 2008

Smoke, No Mirror

Sometimes I think I am looking in a mirror but a twist in perspective and voila, I realize I was lost in smoke. Illusionists have used smoke for centuries. The smoke distracts and distorts one's sense of reality
Yesterday, I thought I was facing myself but I was just lost in smoke (illusion). I thought I was stuck between two worlds but in retrospect I find that I am not (I only thought I was). I am much further into the 'next' world than I thought.
Yesterday, I was feeling down (depressed) as if I was hopeless and stuck - not knowing what to do next. So I wrote about it on this blog. And Starngely, that changed things. As soon as I wrote my post - I felt lighter and happier - as if I let go of something. As the day went along, I found that I was getting happier and more empowered.
Then last night it all came together.
Last night, I meditated using a CD I got from the library. It promised the user that marvelous things would happen because the CD was made using 'Brain Sync' (Brain Wave Therapy). I have heard such claims before and have not found marvelous results when I have tried them. But I tried this with an open mind. It was a very strange meditation - full of weird noises - at one point I thought the CD was stuck but it was not - oddly enough I thought the strange noises were pleasant (even when it seemed to be stuck) - I became very relaxed and peaceful.
When the CD ended, I laid still for awhile and thought of being stuck on the edge of two worlds - and my viewpoint shifted and I realized that I was not stuck between these worlds in any other way except mentally - my thoughts had put me in that place not my actions.

Suddenly, the smoke in my mind cleared and I saw myself in a different light. and I knew without a doubt who I really was. I also knew then that the process of the feeling down and lost, was necessary in order for me to seek a different view of myself - in order to know myself better. So take heart, you guys, sometimes feeling the blues is a necessary step on the path to something better.
I am hoping you have a joyful day without too much smoke and mirrors,
P.S. Sorry again for the bummer of a post yesterday.

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